אפרת רזאל בראיון: "השידוך שלי עם אהרון היה נס מעל הטבע"

I want to tell everyone here how lucky we are to be mothers. You see, it's not so guaranteed, that we merited this. And because I also have big children and small daughters, I have a kind of perspective that I see how it passes quickly. Efrat, dear, how are you? Baruch Hashem, it's good to have you here. Baruch Hashem, it's good to meet you. It's a pleasure, it's my privilege, really. Really, it's great that Hashem arranges interesting meetings like this. Right. Baruch Hashem. So really, a lot of people know you as the wife of Aaron Razel, the famous singer. But not everyone knows that you

are actually a singer yourself. You write, compose, sing, you're very musical. Therapist by training. Baruch Hashem, you teach brides. And a mother of nine children. Baruch Hashem. Baruch Hashem, because that's the most important thing. That's right. Of course, that's the most important thing. So tell me, how do you manage all the... How do you juggle everything that we mentioned? How do you do it? How do you do it all together? So it's really important for me to tell you, Moran, that we don't manage. You know what? Today, in the age of the media and all these things, you always see these

successful women, and they are also mothers of 17 children, they also manage, I don't know what, they also do thousands of things, and then you suddenly shrink into your place, and you say, what? Who am I? How am I going to do something in this world? And it's all so external and not right. And the truth is that there are a lot of times of frustration, when things don't work out, and it's not... And really, the most important thing for me is my children. - That's very special. And you have a small, timely, story. You really have an amazing story about meeting each other. Aaron and I. Yes. Can

you tell us a little bit about it? I'm happy to share it, because I consider to be publicizing a miracle, because I think it's very important for me that we all know that there is a concept of miracles in the world. We have nature, and we have the supernatural. You know, the Lubavitcher Rebbe also says to publicize miracles. Yes. It's important. So I too. I want to publicize this miracle, and from it, everyone will take strength for themselves, for their lives. And my story begins many years ago. There was a princess who couldn't find her husband. And she was praying, going and praying. And

it was the year of Shmita, like this year. And she felt that by her too, everything was abandoned. It wasn't coming, it wasn't happening. That she couldn't find her place in the world. And how old was the princess then? It's a secret. It's a secret, but she was really, really, in her eyes, she was really, really, a very old single Later, she realized that she wasn't that old, but for her, it was very, very... her soul was like, "I can't take it anymore." She was really - she? Me. I really prayed for it. And really, like this, I would go to the corner of some field, next to my parent's house,

and I would really pray for this. And I would see the changes in nature. How, like the crops suddenly become vegetables, suddenly they begin to bud. Really, like, and I would say, "So there are things that change, so why doesn't it change for me, Hashem? Everything is abandoned, the year of Shmita, but where is my partner?" And then Purim came. And on Purim, someone, I heard about the fact that there is a very meaningful time, on Purim night, at midnight, that "anyone who stretches out their hand - we give them." This means, you are a poor person, there are gifts for poor people on this day,

it is a day that is above nature, you come and you say to HKB"H, "All those that stretch out their hands, You give to them, right? I, am a poor person, I need something from You, give it to me." And He has to give it to you, because that is what you have to do on Purim. If you see some poor person, you don't "check his Tzitzis" he needs something, you give it to him. So just like that, HKB"H, gives to you. Good, I put this thing, like this, in my head, and I was at some girls' party, and I forgot about the special time, at midnight. And at about three in the morning, I remembered that they

told me that there is a special Eis Ratzon at midnight. So what should I do? I missed the special time. So I told myself, every hour can be an Eis Ratzon. So I went out like that. It was a kind of alley. It was here in Nachlaot. I went out and really, I remember that I sat down and said, "Ok, now HKB"H, I am going to ask from you." But I still didn't have time to speak. I saw from a distance three drunk men. So even before I had time to escape from the drunks, who were Purim drunks, it wasn't something truly scary, and they were walking, - "Drunks in holiness" "Drunks in holiness" and one of

them was Aaron, he should live. And he was just walking with them and said to them, "Give me a Bracha that I will find my partner." And they said to him, "Why are you asking us?" There is a woman here on the street. Now I was in a costume. I was wearing a white scarf on my head. and he said to me, "Excuse me, are you married?" And I said, "no." "So you are my match." So I said to him, "You are a drunk." You know, you don't talk to boys like that. So he said to me, "Drunk is an anagram of the word 'Kosher'". And there was this kind of conversation that was very, very meaningful. It wasn't

long, his friends were waiting for him, and he was on his way to some performance. It was a three day Purim. so there was Thursday, Friday, Saturday, so I think it was Motzei Shabbos. So he was already drunk for a few days. But there was something about the conversation that was very real, words of Truth. It wasn't just a conversation on the street. Yes, yes. And I also felt very comfortable. I was an experienced dater, and it was always like, "What do you do?" Very dry things like that. And here it was very real and deep. And I also felt comfortable that he didn't know who I was. Because I

didn't tell him, maybe I told him my name, but he doesn't know who I am, and I was wearing a costume. And that's it...it was only... And I also had tried to clarify a very deep point there, of what is this whole Purim thing? Like, does it help you that you are drunk? Where is the joy? And I had this clarity with him, beautiful, deep and interesting. And then how things played out... It was a connection of souls. Yes, yes. It was a connection. Then the soul knew that she met her match. And then a friend of mine came and called me, I just walked away, and left. And that's it. Purim passed, it

was over, and a few days after Purim I have a birthday. And then, I studied at that time, I'm a therapist, I studied therapy in the north. And I was on my way home for my birthday. And I was so upset about this birthday. Wow, wow. I told my mother, I don't want anything, no parties, nothing. Just nothing. Nothing, I don't want anything. And on the way I also prayed. Because that's what I know how to do. I said, "HKB"H, I'm begging you, give me a gift for my birthday - my match." And then, as my birthday started, a phone call. "Hello, Efrat, This is Aaron Razel. I was drunk for a few days, but

I didn't forget our conversation." And I'm like... What? Where did you get my phone number? How do you know who I am? How did you get to me? It turns out there is one neighbor, a Shadchan. She just called and told him, "I heard you met Efrat on Purim, and if you would like to meet her..." And then I said to myself, wow, a minute ago I spoke with HKB"H, and I asked for a gift from Him. So it's possible that he is the gift. And it really was him. How special and amazing. Yes, truly. And it's a miracle. Why is it a miracle? Because I went out and he came. And I want to strengthen everyone that

the concept of miracles exists in the world. You can't despair. You can't... let go... it happened exactly after the prayer, everything happened with such Hashgacha... - Really Hashgacha Pratis. - Prayer really brings about miracles. - Really Hashgacha Pratis. - Prayer really brings about miracles. Absolutely. And how is the collaboration between you two? It's just amazing that you are a musician, and he is a musician, and this connection between you, how is it? How does it go? Do you have any collaborations? It's funny, he always jokes that he needs his space to create, to go to a room, to

sit with the piano, to write, and he needs the silence. And he always, when he comes back, all the kids are on me, I'm like, covered in laundry, I don't know what. I say to him, "Wow, I wrote two songs today." So he always talks about these differences between a man and a woman, that the woman creates, I do, from life, from what's happening to me, and he needs his alone time. It's amazing, you really create with the kids, here's a kid, there's a kid. Yes, yes. And what? Do you hear something from above? Yes suddenly... Yes, yes, yes, I say, "Wait a second, I'm recording myself." Sometimes I

forget. But seriously, here we really help each other. We're different in our creative styles. His style is more upbeat, totally fun and mine, I have a deeper style like this, Do you influence each other with writing? We influence each other a lot. Do you influence each other with writing? We influence each other a lot. Yes, everything, he plays for me, We influence each other a lot. Yes, everything, he plays for me, and I, let's say, many times I write with him. Meaning, with words. or a tune, I tell him "Wow I really like that." "Remember it, remember it." "Don't change it, don't change

it." And he also helps me. Many times he tells me, "Come let's listen." And it's a lot of fun. How special. It's very special. Do you have a specific joint composition, that you're the most attached to? Yes, yes, yes. That touches your heart the most. Our creation, That was actually when we traveled on our own, with our small baby who came with us. We went to Eilat, And I think Aaron already had the tune And then I told him, "We need to find words for this tune. Because it's such a beautiful tune." And then, What actually found its way to this tune, Was a story that happened to us in the

family, That Yonatan and Yael's daughter, Aaron's brother, Yonatan Razel, Fell off the roof, And we all know this story, We all prayed for Rivky, the one we love that B"H Another miracle that I want to publicize here, How she really came out of everything, And she's such an amazing girl, But then, when it happened, It was a very, very scary time, And we very much wanted to be with them, And we went through all this tension, Of you don't know what will happen, what the day will bring. So she was in a coma in Hadassah Ein Karem, And we were there a lot. And one night Aaron was with Yonatan, How

long was this period? How long was it? It was a period, I can't say how many months. Wow. At first it was in Ein Karem, then in Alin, But what was very strong, Is that you're able to deal with Emunah and Bitachon. This is your opportunity to seek out these topics. This is what actually happened, Is that one night, it was a very scary night, So Aaron stayed with Yonatan at the hospital, And in the morning he left him a note, a small one, He wrote to him, "are you ready for the miracle that this day will bring?" That's how... Aaron wrote to Yonatan. Yes, he left it for him and he had to go, And

he left it for him. Now, some time ago, Yonatan showed him that he framed it. - Really? This note, this quote, It was after a lesson that they learned from the Nesivos Shalom, Something very, very beautiful about the trait of Bitachon, That someone comes to the city, And the soldiers catch him, because he can't be there. They put him in jail, and then he says to them, "What are you putting me in jail for? I'm the king's relative." And then, in the morning, the king comes and says to him, "Do I know you, you said I'm a relative of yours?" He comes to see who said that he was a relative of his,

And then he says, "I knew that since I said you're a relative... I trusted in you, that since I said you were my relative, That you wouldn't jail me. You wouldn't punish me." And then he says, "if he placed such trust in me, then let him go." So Bitachon is like this. Bitachon itself brings the Yeshua. "I trust in You, that You will bring me the Yeshua." "I trust in You that she will be healed." "I trust in You..." anything that you say, That you say with confidence that it will happen, So, the Bitachon itself brings the Yeshua. So...in that miracle - getting back to that trip, When Aaron and

I traveled to Eilat, So, in fact, we wanted to analyze this Whether you're ready for the kindness that this day will bring. Which every day is so precious to us, also now as mothers. How much do you need... I even wrote it here, when we leave the house, I'll show you in a minute. It's really... Remember, I'm waiting... Okay, I'm waiting for the kindness, I'm confident there will be kindness, And then the confidence itself brings about the kindness. Wow, that's a very strong story. Yes. Is there some kind of difficulty that you can share with us? Yes. Tell us about some kind of difficulty and

how you grew from it. How you got through it. Because I really want to say that there are a lot of pains in life. There are many times where it doesn't go the way you want it to go. And... This is fascinating, because in your songs there's a lot of hope. And... This is fascinating, because in your songs there's a lot of hope. Right, right. Which is interesting, because many times people create from pain, And it's also expressed in their songs, and your songs have a lot of hope. Right, but that's exactly the power. That's exactly the power that brings you out, Because, for example, I can

share, I had a childhood friend, a very dear friend, Her name was Ruth Fogel, if you've heard of her. Hashem should avenge her blood. And she was really dear to all of our friends, And really, when she was murdered, It just hit me, Like, that's it, death, you don't... How do you pick yourself up from there? Because I always... It's murder. It's murder, it's awful, it's with her children and her husband, And whoever's left behind. I'm always a very hopeful person, I'm very optimistic, And I always... I'll tell you about a character that influenced me a lot in life, It was my grandmother, her

name was Roni. She was a really sweet and wonderful woman, Who was ahead of her time in many ways, And she always told me, "Don't worry, Efrat, the window was shut, we'll open the door, if the door is shut, the window will open. Don't worry." So I always took that message with me, Because I said, No, you can't, something will open, something... I don't agree to accept that. And I had... That's just one example of a place where you just... You get up and you say, How am I going to get up? I don't understand how you're supposed to get up from something like that. But that's exactly the place

you need to go. So, as I said before, Emunah and Bitachon, It's not like everything's fine by me, And everything's going so well, And I'm successful in life, and I'm perfect, No, it's exactly in this place of pain. Let's connect to our father Yaakov, and Sara our mother. Yaakov Avinu, when he ran away, And they chased him, and Eliphaz took everything from him. So that's actually, this year I took, And it really, really strengthened me, When he said, לית אנא מוביד סברי מן בריה "I'm not willing to lose my Emunah and my Bitachon." Like, it doesn't matter what, It doesn't matter how far you fall,

It doesn't matter what challenges you face, It doesn't matter how you... And you're right, you're right, Because it's really hard for you, what you're going through now. But also our mother Sara saw that there weren't any grapes on the vine, Like, she doesn't have a chance to have children in this world, she doesn't. But as we said, there is nature, and there is above nature. And above nature, everything is possible. I have a friend is 48 that just had twins. I have a friend now, This week, just this week, she got engaged, I don't want to say how old she is, because it's... Like, let's say, I

too already gave up on her, And she simply got engaged. So, like, never say never, Because you always have to, You can either believe or not believe. And you can either fall or get up. That's it, you have two options. And you have to decide what you're going to do with it. And... And I also write songs. Like, really, if I'm in a place of pain and difficulty, I write songs, and I'm trying, Yes, so there I'm trying not to say, "I have it bad, bad bad", like... But let's pick ourselves up, let's remember that there is HKB"H, And there is hope, and there is faith, and there is... And then, that's

the place, that, and Torah, too. To learn, to read something, some book. Do you study a lot? Like, do you have a study partner? Or do you learn on your own? How do you... Yes, I have a study session with my husband, Aaron. Wow, that's great. We learn Mesilas Yesharim. And it's very... It's amazing, it's really fun. And two cups of coffee. Amazing, we're talking about studying and books. Yes. Is there a book that influenced you in particular? Something that goes with you, like, every day? Some passage from there, or a sentence from there, That you remember? Yes, there is something, it's

related to what we just talked about, That when I was a girl, a teenager, So my friend, it was written for her in her siddur, At the beginning of the siddur, someone wrote a dedication for her. And it was from Rabbi Nachman, And after that, when I was already an adult, I went to look where it was from. And the sentence is like this. "Prayer changes nature. Because nature demands yes, and prayer is above nature. And that's the concept of miracles, That one should believe that there is a Renewer, And in His hand, to renew a thing as He wills." Wow. Yes. Strong. "Prayer changes nature." Right,

you don't have a child, you don't have a spouse, You don't have a job, you're despairing, But "prayer changes nature." "Nature demands yes", yes, It demanded that my friend didn't have a chance to have children. Today she has three daughters. So never to lose hope from this place, That this is the concept of miracles, But you have to believe. You understand, if you don't believe me, it won't happen. What is special about your motherhood? My motherhood? Yes, share with us. Wow. What is special about my motherhood? First of all, I really... I want to tell everyone here How lucky we are to be

mothers. You understand that it's not so guaranteed. That we merited this. And because I have both big children and small daughters, So I have a kind of perspective that I see how quickly it passes by. How fast... Another second. And they've already flown away. So I value it so much. I really want to tell all of us How much it's worth. How much it's worth, the place. Because many times women are frustrated, What am I doing in real life? What are you doing? I'm a mother? Like, what am I? And they try to compare themselves with men, Which is not the point at all. We have the power of bread, of

food, Not just, Hafrashas Challah, all the Segulos, It's the power of food. Like HKB"H, who lights up the world, Who nourishes everyone. That's how women are. Think about it, you have the power with your food. Everything. You're simply creating people. And also to give birth to children. It's so... It's so huge and big. So if I could leave here with a message, It's really that we know just how lucky we are That we have these amazing children. And I'm really trying... Aaron always tells me, He comes to me, "We're crazy." "Just know that we're crazy." Because we don't realize what we have. You

know, you're complaining, you're saying, "This isn't working." "And this child..." really you just don't... Like, if we'd realize what we really have, We'd be dancing all day. All day. And I was recently at R' Eliyahu's Yahrtzeit commemoration, ZT"L, And his daughter-in-law told a story... I really internalized it. About someone, that Lo Aleinu, they told him, That's it, his life is over. His liver is gone, and that's it. He has a few days to say goodbye. And he came all broken to R' Eliyahu. And he said to him, "What am I going to do?" And he said to him, "Will you do everything I tell you?"

And he said to him, "Even if you tell me to jump off the roof, I'll do it, I'm not... That's it, I'm done, what can I do?" And he said to him, "You'll do what I tell you. Now, every day, you wake up in the morning, And start dancing, Start thanking HKB"H for what you have." So he looked at him and said to him, "What do I have?" He said to him, "Do you have a wife?" "I have." "Do you have children?" "I have." "Do you have a home?" "I have." "Dance about what you have. Not about what you don't have, not about the news they told you." And that's our proclivity as women, We always see, wait a

minute, what do I not have? What's not going right for me, with this? What's missing? What's still not perfect? What didn't I get enough of? And, like, it has to be exactly the opposite. And that's what I hope, That I'm trying to do in my motherhood, That, like, I wake up in the morning, That man, by the way, Three days later, they called him, And they said he has a liver donor, And he's been alive since then, B"H, 14 years. May Hashem bless his days and his years. So I really said, Yeah, I'm taking it upon myself, Just, really, to get up, And see what I have. So we have these amazing

children, Let's just take advantage of this amazing time with them. Really, take these moments. To value it. They pass by very quickly. Yes. Right. They truly are the diamonds, and I just say, They're diamonds, you're my diamonds, And whoever's hauling diamonds, It's not too hard for him. It's not too heavy for him. It's not a burden. Amazing. Dear Efrat, Thank you so much for an amazing interview, That inspires with Emunah and Bitachon. Thank you. You gave us so much inspiration with all of these miracles. I think you've told me, Throughout this interview today, You're accompanied with many

miracles. This also inspires Emunah. We should always merit miracles. Really, to awaken us to return every moment. We should always merit miracles. Really, to awaken us to return every moment. And to recognize the moment, Just to recognize the good that we have now, And recognize the moment. And thank you so much to those watching at home. I'm sure you got a lot of things, And a couple of messages. So, be"H, we'll see you in the next show. Thank you.